Dear Murray my fiance and i are having a huge problem in the bedroom. the other day he, um, asked me if i would, um , swallow. I have never done this before, and I am disgusted, but at the same time, i don’t want him to cheat on me… am I just not kinky enough? When he asked me to put my finger in his ass during sex, i …continue…
Monthly Archives: October 2007
Bush unveils plan to fight Southern California wildfires
By Dear Murray Associated Pests President Bush on Friday revealed his administration’s plan to quell the raging wildfires that have spread throughout Southern California. “In short,” Bush said with a smug grin, “drop New Orleans on it.” “I’ve spoken to the people of Malibu, and I feel for them. So, I thought to myself, ‘what puts out fires? Water!’ Where can I get lots of water? It was a pretty …continue…
An open letter to my stalkers, you suck
Dear Murray Does it mean a guy is stalking you when he calls over 100 times in one day? -Scared in Scarborough Let’s not rush to judgement just yet. Maybe he’s prone to seizures and/or assdialing his cell phone. That many assdials in one day would lead me to believe that’s quite a large and talented ass, though, so that may not be likely. MAYBE HE JUST HAS A PRESENT …continue…
Coffee? Never ask me about my coffee
Dear Murray Last time I checked I wasn’t a dog. So this morning after going to the same place ive been going for coffee for a month now, and after ordering the same drink for a month now, I decide to spice things up and order something different. I believe i have that right as a tax payer. Anywho, we’ll call her “Holly”. HOlly seemed extremely put out by me …continue…
Love your fellow man, love his hair lip
Dear Murray I have a problem that I really need some clarity on. I’m dating this man, and it’s becoming pretty serious. My dilemma is that he is not that good looking to me. I am used to dating nice looking men and although I love him dearly I can’t get over this natural issue. I want to because I’m ready to move forward but if I’m honest with myself, …continue…