Dear Murray a tasty, tasty bitch beloved and feared by hordes of basement-dwelling illiterati and their fierce antagonists, the Grammar Nazis. He single-handedly turned the webcam whorefest of Myspace into a lively commerce of ideas, including whether or not the TUBGIRL photo will ever be topped as a postmodern expression of the inexpressible. According to web historians, he has inspired more photoshop projects and syphilis jokes than Britney Spears (who he has been repeatedly linked romantically to). He is also rumoured to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby, a disciple of Cliff Yablonski, and the second gunman on the grassy knoll. Although he could not be reached for comment, he reportedly resides in or near the tent cities along the LA River Basin, third right after the walrus sunning station.
He has vehemently denied all charges that he is any any way responsible for that rash your wife claims "is from the heat".
His primary function is doling out advice; the inspiration sprang from an endless and eventually dull repetition of fucktards failed to heed his words.
A secondary result is a dysfunctional family "round table" of people who contribute innumerable one-liners and personal experiences, rarely related in any way to the actual question.
It is estimated that tens of thousands of readers have "LOL'd" approximately 5,395,645,694,167,467,105 times, with the toll expected to rise.
He is immune to kryptonite, chlamydia, and brainwashing.
Wikipedia has banned PENCILTITS's entry, debating the relevance of his tasty bitchiness.
Dear Murray Who are you aside from a crusty old bearded smoker with a penchant for flipping the double bird? You magnifacent bastard! Love the profile. Great shit Doug Murray is gay in San Francisco, black in South Africa… an anarchist in Spain… a Jew in Germany… an artist without […]
Dear Murray I think I am in love with two men at the same time. One guy lives in LA and the other lives in SF. I am moving to Cali shortly for work – either to LA or SF. I now must decide on where to move and focus […]
Dear Murray how come women are such bitches? j christ, what you know about women you could squeeze snugly into an ant’s twat (and still have room for a reacharound). why not just cut to the chase and start referring to women as “them things you stick yer pee-pee in”? […]
Dear Murray:I have a problem I hope you can help me with. (hehe) I have epilepsy and.. My assfuck doctors keep putting me on medication after medication. It’s fucking with me, physically and emotionally. All these different meds cause shitty side effects. What should I say or do tell them […]
Dear Murray I have been contemplating leaving my job for another one. What should I do? -C Ahh, hell. If you’re thinking about it enough to use words like “contemplating”, then you should have quit that shithole job a long time ago. You should update your resume and canvas all […]