Dear Murray

So, the annual Colts-Patriots epic matchup came and went, and did not disappoint. The Colts knocked the Patriots around for a while, had the game in hand, and let it slip away at the end. It was a tough loss, a game we should have won, yadda yadda yadda. Meanwhile, the Patriots can’t let winning be enough. There has been non-stop whining coming out of New England since the fucking game ended.

Jonathan Kraft, the president of the Patriots, accused the Colts of piping in noise. Here’s his proof:

So there's some weird shit that sounds like a CD skipping going on. Suddenly, every Patriots fan is a fucking sound engineer. "I know for a fact that sound can only happen when a mic is too close to a speaker, blahblahblah."

Meanwhile, here's the radio broadcast of the play:

WHA-HEY. No funny noise! No NFL conspiracy. Yes, the Colts DID really almost beat you.Case closed. Quit your goddamn whining, Patriot Nation. You won the game. It obviously left you with a bunch of broken manginas, though.

Pussies.

Now leave me the fuck alone.