Dear Murray a tasty, tasty bitch beloved and feared by hordes of basement-dwelling illiterati and their fierce antagonists, the Grammar Nazis. He single-handedly turned the webcam whorefest of Myspace into a lively commerce of ideas, including whether or not the TUBGIRL photo will ever be topped as a postmodern expression of the inexpressible. According to web historians, he has inspired more photoshop projects and syphilis jokes than Britney Spears (who he has been repeatedly linked romantically to). He is also rumoured to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby, a disciple of Cliff Yablonski, and the second gunman on the grassy knoll. Although he could not be reached for comment, he reportedly resides in or near the tent cities along the LA River Basin, third right after the walrus sunning station.
He has vehemently denied all charges that he is any any way responsible for that rash your wife claims "is from the heat".
His primary function is doling out advice; the inspiration sprang from an endless and eventually dull repetition of fucktards failed to heed his words.
A secondary result is a dysfunctional family "round table" of people who contribute innumerable one-liners and personal experiences, rarely related in any way to the actual question.
It is estimated that tens of thousands of readers have "LOL'd" approximately 5,395,645,694,167,467,105 times, with the toll expected to rise.
He is immune to kryptonite, chlamydia, and brainwashing.
Wikipedia has banned PENCILTITS's entry, debating the relevance of his tasty bitchiness.
Dear Murray, i have plaque in my teeth like evreyone else…but i love to pick it out and smell it unlike everyone else…does that make me gay?????? love, Talia the nose and plaque picker. Damn. Well, we all got disgusting shit we do behind closed doors. Why do we look […]
Dear Murray: My friend has decided to try to set me up with her upstairs neighbor, she’s one of three suites in a house. The guy upstairs has just had an accident at work and broke both his wrists, poor guy!! ha ha She I guess has been talking to […]
Dear Murray: where can i gets me one of them there ass whoopin flashlights like the cops carry?.. haha. don’t they realize they’re on camera? its like people on reality TV shows who *forget* their on camera and start picking their ass or something. -ebony Christ, you just made me […]
Dear Murray, A couple of months ago I broke rule #1: I fucked a guy from work. Hey, I was working overtime which limited my social circles. I was honest from the get-go, saying, “Look this is just sex. Nothing less, nothing more. I’m 31 years old and the whole […]
Dear Murray I admit that I have a few mental issues that probably stem from poor childhood nutrition, and rampant adolescent drug use. Needless to say, I’m needy, loney, and haven’t been laid since there was a democrat in office. Since most people cross to the other side of the […]