WHEN THE STALKING STOPS 6
Dear Murray
i have a problem with a stalker. he’s been stalking me for 2 months now but then he stopped all of the sudden. it really bothers me. do you think i am too fat?
-cindy
You know the thing about stalkers? You never feel lonely when you got a stalker. You ain’t never sitting around thinking “Oh god, I’m so very bored at this moment,” ’cause all you have to do is look outside and there’s your entertainment. Murray ain’t never gonna stalk anybody, ’cause I’m too damned unmotivated. If you want me to stalk you, you’re gonna have to give me an arranged time, and you can drive by and I’ll stalk you. HEY HEY I’M STALKING YOU NOW! OK ARE WE DONE STALKING YET? OK BYEBYE! SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!
You think after two months he hasn’t learned a trick or two? He won’t give up that easily. Good stalking takes lots of practice, and equipment. He just had to save up, and he’s gotten much, much better. Trust me, he’s there right now. Stop fretting, your pudgy ass can rest in peace tonight.
Now leave me the fuck alone.
She needs to give him what he wants to end it. She should just invite him in for drinks and anal. That’ll kill off all the stalking urges he might have.
I’m going to get you, you little harlot.
That was not a stalker, it was the mailman/pizza delivery guy/gardener. Quit fantasizing that anybody cares.
He’s not stalking you. You are just so fucking fat that he can’t help but look at you anywhere he goes.
My bet is he finally moved out of state so he wouldn’t mistake you for Mt. McKinley.
if you have to ask if your getting fat then the answer is yes you are getting too fat for him…but the again he may like the fatties so yea keep eating you pudgebucket…i bet your sitting in front of the computer right now with a pint of ben & jerry’s while hes sitting in the tree watching you…get over yourself your really not that important
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