Good job, America. You’ve just proven that it’s never too soon for a little opportunism!
Saw this shit going around on the Facepage yesterday. “Like this page for 9/11! Woo!” You motherfuckers would sell your own grannie into slavery for a share.
I’m sure that seemed like a brilliant marketing ploy. “Who doesn’t like 9/11? I mean, come on.” Instead, you come across looking like a complete and total fuckwit, and I hope your shitty business gets filled with hantavirus.
Soon, you’ll be having your 9/11 sales. Call now and get a large pizza for only NINE DOLLARS AND ELEVEN CENTS!
What next? HELP US GET TO SIX MILLION LIKES, for all the Jews killed in the holocaust! ANNE FRANK LIKES THIS NAIL SALON.
If you posted that shit, I’m coming to your business and shitting on your floor.
Now leave me the fuck alone.
Categories: Dubya Stupid White People The Innerweb
Dear Murray
Dear Murray a tasty, tasty bitch beloved and feared by hordes of basement-dwelling illiterati and their fierce antagonists, the Grammar Nazis. He single-handedly turned the webcam whorefest of Myspace into a lively commerce of ideas, including whether or not the TUBGIRL photo will ever be topped as a postmodern expression of the inexpressible. According to web historians, he has inspired more photoshop projects and syphilis jokes than Britney Spears (who he has been repeatedly linked romantically to). He is also rumoured to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby, a disciple of Cliff Yablonski, and the second gunman on the grassy knoll. Although he could not be reached for comment, he reportedly resides in or near the tent cities along the LA River Basin, third right after the walrus sunning station.
He has vehemently denied all charges that he is any any way responsible for that rash your wife claims "is from the heat".
His primary function is doling out advice; the inspiration sprang from an endless and eventually dull repetition of fucktards failed to heed his words.
A secondary result is a dysfunctional family "round table" of people who contribute innumerable one-liners and personal experiences, rarely related in any way to the actual question.
It is estimated that tens of thousands of readers have "LOL'd" approximately 5,395,645,694,167,467,105 times, with the toll expected to rise.
He is immune to kryptonite, chlamydia, and brainwashing.
Wikipedia has banned PENCILTITS's entry, debating the relevance of his tasty bitchiness.